Snappleapple450 Post 4: On This Road We'll Travel

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On This Road We'll Traveled

I stood in the middle of the road, staring into the setting sun. It seemed so far away now, where it used to look within arms reach before. Before everything went wrong. Before everything got complicated. Before reality had touched us.

We had a world of our own gazing into the horizon. Reality didn't exist for us. Nick and I would sit right here in the middle of the road and talk about our plans while he played his old guitar. He'd make me sing along with him and we'd end up falling over laughing.

"One day, we're gonna see the end of this road," Nick said pointing to the horizon.

My head was resting on his chest as we watched the sun set. "I hope this road never ends. I want to travel with you forever."

Nick kissed the top of my head. "Soon we will...."

I closed my eyes against the tears that came with the memories. If only he kept his promises. We'd both still be happy and together. If only he didn't let reality get to him the way I let it get to me. We were happy in our own little world. Why did it all have to change?

I blamed myself for it all though. If I hadn't left without him. If I hadn't yelled at him. If I was there for him.

The ifs could go on as long as this road. They never stopped in my head. I knelled down into a fetal position as the memories came. I couldn't understand why I came here again. What was my reason for coming here? I couldn't remember...

"Where are you going?" He asked confused when he saw my packed bags.

I lifted my head, keeping the tears at bay. "I have to leave for a little while."

"I don't understand..." he didn't want to understand is what he meant.

"I got a letter of acceptance into an all-girl school in California. I'm going," I said firmly. I was hoping I could get out of here before he saw me. I was going to leave a letter for him, explaining.

"Kat... why?" was all he could say.

The only words coming to mind. Kat why. Why couldn't I answer him. Kat why. I cleared my throat. "We can't stay here forever."

"We never planned to!" He raised his voice.

My defiant side came out against my will. I raised my voice to match his. "We never planned for any of this to happen! Our plans never happened Nick! We need to move on."

His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open in shock. "So that's it? No warning, no working it out? You're leaving me?"

I hesitated on my answer. He made it sound so bad. He made it sound so real. Slowly, I nodded, picking up my jacket and suitcase. "Good bye Nicholas. I promise we'll see each other again someday..." I reached out to touch his face but he pulled away.

"Don't be so sure." He stormed out of the house, leaving me with my tears.

I was still sitting in the road, wiping my eyes. I never meant to be gone for so long. I only meant to be gone a year or two. Not five long fucking years. I hit my fist against the black concrete, screaming out in the pain, not from my bleeding hand, but from my heart.

I was so selfish to leave him. I still loved him -that was never a question- but I couldn't wait for him anymore. I couldn't stay there, it was killing me. I was suffocating in this small town. So I left.

My mom would write me, keeping me updated on what was happening with everyone. Everything seemed okay for a couple weeks after I left. I knew Nick was upset. My mom knew it too. Her letters became less and less about her and my family and more about Nick. Or maybe that's the only part that would stick out for me. I remembered so vividly the letter she wrote telling me about Nick's drug problem...

Since I'd been gone, he went into a depression and turned to drugs. When I heard about that I very nearly flew back to him, but I knew... I was too late. I'd been gone six months already. the last words he spoke to me were words of hate and sadness. I was the reason for the way he was. It was all my fault.

Knowing that, I too, went into a depression. I couldn't stand being without him. I thought I wanted freedom more but in fact, he was my freedom. He was my air, my world, my everything I thought I didn't have. Suddenly I found myself without it and I couldn't live. I started failing my classes in the school and they kicked me out.

That's when I met Ralph. I had no where to go, no way to get home -as if I was even welcome there anymore- and no money for food. Ralph took me in and gave me a place to stay. Eventually we started going out. My love for Ralph was nothing like my love for Nick. Ralph was purely a physical relationship. I didn't connect with him in any other way.

A few weeks into it, I found out he was an abusive alcoholic. I wanted to get out -get away- but I couldn't. I had no where to go. So I'd stay. And I'd cover up my black eyes with make-up.

My mom continued to send me letters but I stopped writing back. What was I supposed to tell her? That I quit school and was living with a guy? I couldn't do that to her. One day, she just stopped writing altogether. I lost connection with my family, but more importantly, I lost my connection to Nick.

I didn't think about him anymore, I couldn't imagine what he was doing with his life. I wanted to remember the happy times, but it was getting harder to remember anything.

Two years passed and I was feeling tired of the pain. A friend of mine from the school saw me in the store one day and saw what happened to me. She knew instantly as soon as I mentioned I had a boyfriend. I didn't deny it either, I was tired of denying it. She gave me her number and told me to call her when Ralph wasn't home. I was confused but took her number.

I later found out why. I had called her as soon as he left for the bar with some friends and she came over with a couple of my old friends. They immediately started packing my belongings and helping me get out. They said they knew about a place I could go where I would be safe from Ralph. It sounded nice especially after dealing with another beating from him from the night before.

They took me to a shelter for abused women. I never thought of myself as an abused woman. I guess it never clicked. The place helped me get back on my feet though. They gave me food and a place to sleep. I never saw Ralph again.

I eventually grew to be a strong woman, helping other abused women get through their problems. I started working for the shelter instead of using it. I even started writing to my family again. No one mentioned Nick, for which I was thankful. He was just a painful memory. Something I blamed myself for.

And then, I got a postcard.

It was so simple but it meant so much. "You think you deserve that pain but you don't." I knew who it was from as soon as I saw the name "Kat". Only Nick called me that. Everyone else called me Katherine or Kathy. Tears poured from my eyes as I read the eight simple words.

He forgave me. He was telling me it's okay that I left. He was telling me to quit beating myself up about what he became. He was telling me it wasn't my fault. I cried and cried for days, so happy. I felt like a burden had been lifted. I didn't realize how much it bothered me, how much it tortured me inside. And then to hear him tell me it's okay. I could breathe again.

I knew what I had to do. I knew what I wanted to do. I wanted to go home. I wanted to see Nick again. And I finally felt like I could do that now. I bought a one-way ticket and packed my bags.

I was going home.

That's when I got there and everything changed. I went straight home and saw all my family waiting for me. I had let them know I was coming home. I walked in the front door and no one looked up. No one would make eye contact with me. It was like a dark cloud loomed over the house.

"W-where's Nick?" I suddenly feared to ask.

No one answered. My mom came over to comfort me but I backed away, shaking my head.

"No," I whispered.

"Baby, he...overdosed. He... he died last night..." My dad explained.

I backed towards the door. "No!" I ran out of the house, heading to his house. I had to see him. They were lying. They all were lying. Halfway to his house I stopped. I was at our spot. I recognized it easily, even after all these years.

I walked to the middle of the road, staring into the setting sun. It seemed so far away now, where it used to look within arms reach before.... Kat why? Why did it all have to go so wrong?

Destynee_Cullen Post 2: I Just Wanted to See the Unicorn

I Just Wanted To See The Unicorn

The glass was cold. I could feel it against the palm of my hands. Raindrops stuck to the window like tiny little beads. Some running into others and creating bigger ones that were too heavy and would fall to the city below. The sky was the color of white, no break in the smooth sheet of cloud. It looked as if it went on and on forever but I knew without a doubt, it was sunny somewhere. There had to be some kid out there basking in the sunlight. Maybe in Africa. I had heard my teacher say it hardly ever rains there.

"Sweetie, get away from the window." My mom led me away. "Come on, get your coat on."

She helped me into my favorite purple jacket and took my hand. We walked down the long hallway towards the elevators. We were in my dad's workplace. We decided to surprise him with a visit on our way to go shopping. Tomorrow is my 8th birthday. I couldn't wait. My mom was taking me to find nice clothes to wear.

The elevator dinged and we got in next to a man. I stared up at him, curiously. He was tapping his finger against his leg in a rhythm no one but him could hear. He looked nervous like he was waiting for something. His hair was messy and I wondered if he had brushed it this morning. Even his clothes looked messy. Maybe he didn't have a mom to wash his clothes or brush his hair for him like I did. He looked down at me and I looked quickly away, embarrassed at being caught. My mom was watching the numbers on the elevator, not paying attention to the man. 6...5...4...3...2...1... It dinged again and all three of us exited the small room.

My mom held tight to my hand as we walked out into the wet street. The rain had stopped about an hour ago but raindrops were still falling from higher places it clinged to. I looked up into the sky at the tall building we were just in. I couldn't tell which window I had been looking out of earlier. There were too many.

"Come on, baby. Keep up." My mom tugged on my arm and I focused on where we were walking.

We went to the big place with lots of stores inside. My mom said it was the mall. My eyes lit up with fascination at all the lights and pretty things in the windows. We walked into one of the stores, maneuvering through the people. I found some pretty pink dresses and shiny black shoes to wear with them. When I tried them on I felt like a princess. I twirled around in the dress and it spun out around me. I tripped over my feet and tumbled to the ground, giggling. When I looked up to see if anyone noticed, I saw that man again. He was standing off in the distance, behind a rack of clothes, watching me.

I stood up and dusted myself off, trying to ignore him. My mom came up and took me back to the dressing room to get dressed into my old clothes. She bought the dresses and handed me the bags. I was happy to carry them. It made it feel like it was my own.

"Can we pleeeeeaaaasse go to the toy store?" I begged her.

She looked a little hesitent so I jumped up and down, pulling on her arm.

"Please please please please please please please please pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaaasssee?!"

She laughed and started walking to the toy store. I smiled happily. The store was huge. My mouth hung open as I took it all in. A big robot clown was moving in the corner, waving at children. Airplanes tied to string on the cieling were flying in circles above my head. I heard talking dolls and rawring dinosaurs. This was amazing!

"Can I go look around please?" I bounced around.

My mom chuckled at me and let go of my hand. "Go pick something out. It will be your early birthday gift from me."

I cheered as I ran off into the store, looking at all the wonderful toys displayed around me. I could never be able to pick just one thing. Pink unicorns sparkled in a row, little blonde dolls dressed up sat smiling at me, everything was so much fun!

I grabbed a unicorn and petted its mane, she was so cute and fluffy. Her horn sparkled from the lighting up above. "I'll call you Lisa!" I hugged the unicorn tightly. I would get this for my gift.

"Do you like unicorns?" I heard a man ask.

I turned around and saw the man from earlier. He grinned down at me, his breath smelled bad and his teeth were yellow. I didn't want to be rude so I nodded. He chuckled to himself like there was some kind of joke.

"Do you want to see my unicorn?" He continued.

My eyed widened. "You have a unicorn?" I asked in disbelief.

He laughed again. "Yes, a real life unicorn. Do you want to see it?"

My mouth fell open. "You mean its here?!" I looked around seeing if I could find it.

He looked around quickly, his black eyes flicking to all the faces before turning back to me. "Yeah it's outside waiting for you. Come on, I'll show you." He held his hand out for me to take it.

I looked around suddenly scared. Maybe I should ask my mom first... He seemed to know what I was thinking. "If you go now, you can tell her ALL about it when you get back," he grinned. "She won't even miss you."

I hesitated, looking down at the unicorn. Without another thought I took his hand and his smile got wider. He led me to the back of the store where there was a door. He looked around quickly and walked right through. It was dark and cold as he led me to another door leading outside.

"Where is it?" I asked, looking through all the parked cars.

"We're almost there," he assured me.

He got to a dark black car and opened the trunk. How did he fit the unicorn in there? He pulled me around to look into the car. "I don't see it," I said, slightly disappointed.

"Are you sure? Climb in there. He wayyy back there."

Determined to see the unicorn, I climbed into the car and started searching. "I don't see i--" The man then slammed the trunk door and everything turned dark. I was silent, confused at what just happened. "Hello?" I whispered, crawling back to where the man had just been a moment ago.

I heard the car start and a loud screeching noise. The car lurched forward, slamming me into the side of the tiny space. I screamed trying to find something to hold onto. The car turned left and right, going really fast. I was scared of what was happening. I didn't understand it. No tears came, my brain was too confused to know if this was a reason to cry. Everytime he made a turn and I rolled to the other side of the car, I screamed. I wanted my mom to come save me.

Suddenly it stopped, the car died and I heard a door slam. A whimper escaped my lips as I waited for what would happen next. I made a promise to myself, I will never leave my mom again. She must be worried to death about me. I hoped I could get back in time for my birthday. I hoped I could get back at all. I heard gravel crunch under someone's shoes. The man unlocked the trunk and opened the door. I squinted against the sudden light. It wasn't bright, I think it was a garage. My eyes adjusted and I stared around. I couldn't think straight. All I knew was I was scared. I was scared of the man. I was scared of this mysterious place. I was scared of that grin he had. Like he was hungry.

"I want to go home." Tears finally fell as I cried.

He grabbed my arm and yanked me out of the car and into the dirty house. His shirt was now unbuttoned and he looked even scarier in the dark house. He threw me into the corner and I just laid there and cried. He locked the door and closed the windows, sitting on the ground across from me. I stared at him through terror-stricken eyes. He was so laid back and relaxed. I wiped my nose on the back of my hand and quieted myself. He pulled a stick out and lit it on fire, putting it in his mouth and blowing smoke out. I'd seen people do this before. The house smelled awful, worse than the man.

After a long silence, he looked up at me with those hungry eyes. Tossing the thing from his mouth he stood up, coming towards me grinning. "I'm not going to hurt you." He assured me, but I instantly knew he was lying. "That's a pretty coat you have on."

I backed farther into the corner, whimpering as he closed in on me. I knew then that I wasn't going to be home for my birthday.

Snappleapple450 Post 3: Where'd All The Good People Go?

Where'd All The Good People Go?

"I promise I'll be home for Christmas, mom. Don't worry about me. ....No I'm staying here for a while. ...Just until I get my life straightened out. I love you too.... bye."

I hung up with my mom and sighed. After my fiance cheated on me with my best friend, I moved away to Chicago, taking a job as a writer for the Chicago Times. I didn't want to stay in that small town in New Mexico anyway. Sure the people were nice, real friendly. My best friend, Leslie, and I grew up together, we shared everything... including guys too, apparently. I just needed to get away from it all. I was a laughing stock to the whole town.

At least here, I was a stranger. Starting new in a new place. Nobody knew me nor cared to know me.

I went down to my car and grabbed the last two boxes, juggling them on top of each other. I could barely see over the top of the boxes, just enough to not hit any walls. The only apartment I could afford and it was run down and nasty. I swear one of the rooms in the building had a dead body hidden in it, and another had five little children always running through the hallways.

Great.

I reached the old elevator and extended my index finger to hit the button. Just as I almost could touch it, the box on top started to sway. I cursed as it hit the ground, my pictures and books scattering the hallway.

"Oh let me get that for you!"

I set the other box down and started grabbing my belongings. "No, thank you, I can handle it," I said, not looking up.

The man bent down and reached for my favorite book; I tried to get it before him but he already had it. "Thank you, but I've got it." I said more firmly, meeting his gaze.

He looked about my age, dark hair and a natural tan. His eyes were almost black and he had that bright white smile you only see in movies. By the looks of him, he had Hispanic features. Any other girl would be head over heels with his smile and muscular chest like that, but I just wanted to get up to my room.

He chuckled slightly, looking down at the book. "The Scarlet Letter?" He asked, looking back up at me.

I tucked my hair behind my ears and nodded. "Yeah, what about it?"

He smirked, handing it back to me. "I remember reading it in school, but I didn't think people actually read it on their own free will."

I glared, grabbing the rest of my stuff and shoving it in the box. "If you don't mind, I'd like to get up to my room. It was nice meeting you."

He stood up, still smiling like he had an inside joke. "I'm Jose, by the way. I live in apartment 2C." He stuck his hand out towards me.

I stared at him, picking up the two boxes. "I don't care." The elevator doors opened and I walked inside.

"I'll see you again soon!" He called as the doors closed.

I rolled my eyes, leaning against the wall. I got up to my room and dropped the boxes on the floor. A picture laid on top of the books and I picked it up. It was a picture of John, Melissa, and me by the lake on a summer afternoon. I was smiling and had my arm around him and Melissa.

I threw the picture across the room and the frame shattered against the wall. I slid down onto the floor and curled into a ball, crying. I cried for the first time since I found out John had cheated. I remembered thinking that maybe, just maybe he was joking. I waited to hear the punch line, to hear him laugh and say 'I'm just kidding' but that never happened. His face was so serious, he reached his hand out to comfort me, but I batted it away. The joke was on me. I was the punch line.

I wiped my eyes and just sat there, looking around the empty apartment. It was so bare and void of life. ...Unless you counted the mouse droppings along the back wall. This was my new home and I would live it to the fullest.

After I unloaded everything and put things in their places, I gathered all my pictures and stacked them in a pile on the middle of the floor in the living room. I took my lighter and lit the pictures, the fire spread, melting and blending the colors into a blur. The smoke surrounded me as I watched John's face burn in the fire.

Suddenly my door flew open and the man from earlier burst through with a fire extinguisher. White foam covered the stack of pictures and me included. I couldn't move, reality hadn't caught up yet. Once Jose was satisfied that the fire was out he dropped the red container.

Slowly, I stood up and looked down at myself. "What...the hell...is WRONG WITH YOU?!" I screamed at him.

He gave my foam-covered body one look and died laughing. "I'm sorry!" He choked out between laughs. "I smelled smoke and came to help you!"

I glared at him, so furious I couldn't even speak.

"Come on, I'll help you get cleaned up." He reached for my arm, but I pulled away. A natural reaction when I remembered John, reaching to comfort me. Jose didn't back down. He grabbed me by the elbow and led me down to his apartment. My mind still wouldn't function right, all that smoke I inhaled couldn't be good.

Once we got to his apartment, he took me into the bathroom and had me stand in his bathtub while he grabbed the detachable hose. "It might be cold at first but it'll warm up." He turned the water on and started at my feet.

As soon as the cold water hit me, I snapped back into reality. "What are you doing?!"

He chuckled, continuing to hose me down. "I'm helping you."

I reached for the hose, but he pulled away, squirting me in the stomach. I glared at him, jumping out of the tub. He soaked me down and I screamed. It wasn't a scream in anger, but in delight. I reached for the hose again and he dodged me. Finally I tripped him and he fell into the tub. I squirted him in the face and he wiped his eyes, running his hands through his hair, slicking it back. I continued to soak him, his clothes getting wet and sticking to his body. By the time we were done, we were both soaked and laughing. I had fallen into the tub beside him and he reached up and turned the water off.

We lay there for a few moments, laughing at ourselves. "So why were you burning pictures in your living room?" He finally asked.

I sobered up quick. "Burning memories."

He looked over at me. "What memories are so bad you'd want to forget them?"

I got out of the tub and reached for a towel. "I heard it's good therapy." I shrugged, wanting to change the subject.

I handed him a towel and helped him out of the bathtub. We dried off and attempted to dry the bathroom walls too.

"Don't worry about it. We still have to clean the foam from your apartment. Sorry about that."

I shook my head. "Don't worry about it. I guess you were just worried about--"

"Letting you burn in your apartment?" He laughed.

I chuckled. "I guess..."

"Do you want to stay for dinner? I'm cooking." He grinned his toothy smile and headed for the kitchen. I followed him.

"You cook?" I wondered around his apartment, looking at the different pictures and paintings.

"Cook, clean, and when I'm not being completely gay..." He chuckled with me. "I take pictures. I'm a professional photographer."

I turned the corner and came into one room with light bulbs dangling from the ceiling in the form of a canopy. It was very strange but oddly mesmerizing and beautiful. Jose appeared and grinned. "I was just working on this for a new photo shoot. What do you think?"

"What's it supposed to be for?" I asked, looking up.

He stood inches in front of me, staring into my eyes. "The man and woman are going to stand under here... I want to capture that exact moment before the kiss."

He leaned in and I backed away. "Um I think I'll just go back to my apartment. I need to start cleaning anyway. Thanks for...well... bye." I headed for the door when Jose beat me to it.

His grin was almost taunting. "I never learned your name."

I cleared my throat again, handing him his towel. "My name is Lynn. Now please," I pushed him out of the way, opening the door. "I have to go."

He stepped away from the door and I left quickly, getting back to my room. Everything was foam covered. God he couldn't aim, could he? After an hour of cleaning, my back hurt and my hands smelled of chemicals. I threw the remains of photos in the trash where they belonged and went to shower.

I tied my hair up in the towel and got into my nightshirt. I didn't have a bed but I bought an air mattress the day I bought the apartment. I could live without things for a while, at least until I started getting a weekly paycheck again. My stomach growled and I regretted not taking Jose up on his offer for dinner.

Why did it matter if I had dinner with him? He seemed nice enough. No harm in being civilized with him. My hatred for all men shouldn't affect him. I could be nice. I brushed my hair out and pulled my thin blanket up over me, falling asleep.

The next morning I got ready, starting a ritual. I'd have to grab a coffee on the way to work since my fridge was empty. I grabbed my purse and headed for the elevator.

"Hey wait up!" Jose yelled from down the hallway. He ran into the elevator and I closed the doors. He smiled at me and said good morning. I nodded and smiled back.

"Nice outfit, it suits you. You don't look like you belong in this apartment building," he complimented.

The elevator doors opened and I walked out with Jose beside me, the morning sun was coming up over the buildings.

"Lynn?" I froze mid-step.

Jose looked behind me and tapped my shoulder. I took a deep breath and turned around to face him.

I put on a fake smile. "John."

Jose looked between my stiff figure and John's apologetic stance. "Your mom told me where I could find you.... I thought you'd be alone." He glanced at Jose quickly, then back to me.

I opened my mouth to speak, but I lost my voice. He caught me off guard. I didn't think I'd ever have to see him again. Especially like this. Jose suddenly wrapped his arm around me, and smiled at John.

"Hi, I'm Jose. Are you a friend of Lynn? She never mentions you..." Jose shook John's hand.

John was just as confused as me. "Uh actually I'm her fiance."

I snapped and was suddenly angry. "Excuse me?"

"Lynn, I came to apologize. I made a stupid mistake and I want you back."

I stiffened and my expression grew cold. "Well I'm not coming back if that's what you're thinking."

John reached for my arm and Jose's grip tightened defensively. "That's exactly what I'm thinking. Lynn, everyone misses you. Your mom and dad...Melissa--"

"That bitch can go suck your dick for all I care. I'm done with you." Jose rubbed my arm soothingly to calm me down. "Good bye John," I finished.

He sighed and got back into the waiting cab without another word. After he drove off, Jose released me. I turned to face him.

"Why'd you do that?" I asked.

Jose smiled. "I didn't want him thinking you were lonely." He winked at me and walked off, whistling a tune.


I stared after him, silently. Maybe not all guys are bad...